oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize