How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Randomize
