FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
