So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
