I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Vodka?
Forever.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
try to milk me bitch
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize