Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
