Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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