Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Randomize
