I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
