this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
