Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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