we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
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My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
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I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize