carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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