Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
