Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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