we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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