I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
