Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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