I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
