So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
