I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
i drank out of a bidet.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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