I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
My vagina is officially offended.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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