Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
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