Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Randomize