shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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