I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Randomize
