ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
