Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
