I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Do vagina's smell?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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