Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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