remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
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