You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
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