im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
