What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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