but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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