i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
