Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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