It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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