Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
