I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
