I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
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He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
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But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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