2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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