Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
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