we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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