i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
