Buhtt sex?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
