That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
