someone get that fucking seahorse.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize