K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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