Nicole vs. Life
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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