I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
